AUTHOR: J DATE: 1:51:00 PM ----- BODY: Yknow, for a while... I didnt honestly think things could get much worse... I really thought getting laid off, having my career cut off for no good reason, was a pretty big low. Of course not the lowest I could be... but still a pretty big low. Until today, that is... The before mentioned call to the unemployment office and the info dealt to me, that I described as a shock to my system... prompted an actual visit to the office, to make sure I heard them right and/or find out if they made a mistake. All my fears were validated by the guy in the window telling me I have one week, equal to $141, left on my unemployment claim... which means after that week, my benefits are done... gone... all over with. The old story about six months of unemployment, and then a six month extension based on your status... is a myth... a fabrication. Least thats the way it was explained to me. I dont know what to think right now... I dont know what to feel right now. I never thought it would come to this, I honestly never believed it would reach this point. Call me just a little naive... but Id hoped for a little better than this. Im not dead in the water, by any means... I have back pay in freelance money, that if I base on my unemployment benefits, I can live for two more months... till January. I dont know what comes after that. Im scared... more than Ive ever been in my life. Im pissed off... Im depressed... Im determined, more than before... theres a rush of so many emotions, I dont know what they all are. I know I'll never be homeless, thanks to some loving parents... but this is some low point to hit, aided by some spineless fucks who did this to me... punctuated, of course, by my own mistakes. I am, by far, not the worst off I could be... and definitely not as unfortunate as some, I assume. Im sure my problems are small in comparison to some. But right now, at this very moment... Im allowed to feel like this is really really bad... and wonder what I did to deserve it.

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